Morning Walks

It was a long, rough summer for me, but here I am, staring down the barrel of Winter. The leaves have fallen, the weather is beginning to require at least a scarf and gloves, and I am spiritually in my hermit cycle. This is the time of year for deep thoughts. I spend time reviewing the year past to see what worked, what didn't, where I am now and where I want to go when spring pops her pretty head up sometime in March.

I recently acknowledged that I have gotten out of the habit of self-care. Mental illness does not take days off, so I have to be vigilant about making a daily commitment to care for my body, mind and spirit in one way, shape or form - however that looks. I am an early riser, regardless of time of year, what has happened the day or evening before, and regardless of time-zone. Without me-time first thing in the morning, I will still get up early, but I usually start right in on taking care of the house, making my husband lunches, cleaning up the messes we all left from the night before, and generally being of service. By about mid-morning, I get that all-too-familiar feeling of overwhelmedness and resentment.

A few weeks ago, I reintroduced the habit of going for a walk first thing in the morning and am reminded again, of the importance of getting in touch with my Self and my Purpose first thing in the morning. I love walks for many reasons, but let me share some impressions from my morning walk ritual:

Since moving into our house at the end of the lane, I have loved the fact that we live right on the railroad trail here in our town. It carries me to downtown in one direction, and the other direction takes me out to some of the most beautiful inner-city natural areas I know. This has become my happy place. Any time I am in nature, I find myself feeling more alive. The trail is the perfect blend of nature and community.

As soon as we moved in, I started running the trail at various times of day, but I found the morning-time is my favourite time to be on the trail. I have found my morning trail people to be an extension of community that I would otherwise not be a part of. These people are out there, rain or shine, walking their dogs, walking or running alone or in pairs, walking their children to school, walking to the grocery store, but they're all out there, doing the same thing I do. Some walk and talk together, some walk and talk on their phone, one man even walks with his transistor radio tucked into his pocket. I see the regulars biking to work, like I have done in years gone by, but the thing that has made the greatest impact is that they are out there, just like me. Although we each have our own agendas, be it simply getting from one place to another, or getting in touch with nature, or challenging our PR, we are 'out there'. We commune with nature and by extension, with each other.

By reintroducing this me-time, I have reminded myself of the essential, positive impact it has on my life. I reminds me to honour and recognize that on every level, my physical and mental health come absolutely FIRST. This was not always the case, and in this moment in time, the pull of other loved ones' issues compounded with my own battle with S.A.D. makes it particularly challenging to put myself first.

I spent many years putting others before myself. After all, isn't that the golden rule? But the reality is, I gave EVERYTHING away, and left nothing for myself. What I have finally learned and now BELIEVE is that I must keep myself running at top performance if I'm to be able to truly serve others. If I can spend even 30 minutes filling myself up first thing in the morning, I have so much more to offer others throughout the day. My perspective on what I can do, and what I need to do are much more balanced. I can say yes, and no, with grace and more ease than had I not taken that time to set my intention and remind myself of my purpose at the start of my day.

Morning walks or runs might not be for everyone, but I do believe that setting a specific time of day for focussed mental-health sessions and inner reflection will provide a framework to be able to stay grounded and focused on rocking your mission, whatever it is.

My Bulletproof Coffee and Fun With Meat

Today's post comes in the form of both recipe and running daily journal blog.  I have spent too much time trying to craft the perfect post and neglected the point of blogging (for me), which is to keep a running journal of my personal wellness journey with the intention of better understanding myself and inspiring others to enjoy the journey of creating a better life for themselves.

So today, I woke up before dawn to meet my fitness fanatic friends at BSC for some deadlifting. What an awesome way to wake up! I crawled out of bed at about 6 (only snoozed ... once?), made my bulletproof coffee with a simple recipe of:

double scoop of decaf coffee, ground for 15-20 seconds, and aeropressed.

Add to this enough hot water for about 14 oz, and toss it in the blender with 1 Tbsp. coconut oil and 1/4 t. chipotle powder

If I'm lucky, I'll add a couple drops of pure cacao mass and maybe a drop or two of stevia.

Once blended to a light mocha froth, pour in your insulated mug and sip.

I say insulated mug because much of the heat of the drink is lost to the blending, but it usually cools it down just to perfect sipping, swirling temperature. The heat of the chipotle adds to the warming sensation in the winter, and to give my circulation a boost.

Now, it's on to the rest of my day. I am working back towards planning my workouts more in advance, now that our lives have started to level out. For today, I would like to work out again, but I lifted heavy today and I get wicked DOMS, so I need to pace myself.

Since starting to actually lift heavy more often and using machines less, I am finding some interesting changes. It's all mixed in with elements of post traumatic stress from the turmoil of our lives this summer, but I suddenly gained 5 lbs this last (menstrual) cycle. My clothes are fitting tighter, and I don't like that, so even if it's muscle, I need to lean out just a touch. I am working towards that as well.

This is the season for me to be re-evaluating, setting new long term goals and reviewing the ones I am just not paying attention to, and adjusting them. This week, I've been practicing writing more stuff down and not using my phone as much. I made myself a perfect layout for all the things I want to keep track of, and I'm practicing with it, to be sure I've got all elements covered. That's enough for now.

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It's mid-afternoon and I'm settling in to relax while I wait for my latest experiment to finish cooking. I have some cleansing soup that had been sitting in the fridge, which means nobody wanted to eat it except me. I also had 4 lbs of ground turkey that had been thawing in the fridge for the last 2 days and was ready to use.

I did what I usually do: I looked up a recipe for what I sort-of wanted and then started inventing. This is what I came up with. If you care to replicate it somehow, I'd recommend just using 2 c. cooked grain and and 2 c. cooked cruciferous veggies and onion/leek/shallots. My soup had cooked kashi, cabbage, onion, leeks and ginger/lemon/garlic spice.

4 lbs. ground turkey
4 c. cooked soup
5 eggs
1 whole onion, chopped
1/2 leek, chopped
1/2 c. oat flour (or you could use another kind of flour)
16 oz can of diced tomatoes in adobo sauce (Muir Glen)
1 c. tapatio
1 t. granulated garlic (or garlic powder)
2 t. cayenne
1 t. chipotle powder
heaping Tbsp. paprika
1 t. oregano
1 t. basil
Salt and pepper to taste

I could give you detailed instructions on the best way to blend the ingredients together, but half the fun is experimenting! If you need a couple hints:

• whisk eggs before adding them with anything else
• mix dry ingredients and wet ingredients separately before adding them together
• Just take off your rings, and get your hands IN THERE

Making meatloaf reminds me of when I used to make bread every week by hand. It is meditative and visceral and really brings that secret ingredient (you know... love!) to your creation.

I had so much meat, I decided to play a little:

I am ending this evening with snuggles and yummy tea.