Thursday, February 25, 2016

Thursday ... February 25th?

I've lost track of time. I have narrowed my mental scope to what must be done today, this morning, this minute.

Being sick is never fun, and for me it brings the unique opportunity to listen in on my self talk, and when I am ready, to start telling a different story. I tend to rush through the "I'm sick" part of my story, without truly listening into what my body is telling me.

'Slow down', She says.
'Take care of your body', She says.
'Yes, yes. I know, I know. It's just that I don't have time to do ---- right now.' I say, callously brushing aside my body's request.

Now, I know that I play a part in the situation I am in right now. In fact, it is all coming from my allowing. I have allowed external expectations to take precedence over my intuition. But by saying that, I am not making a judgment on myself. I acknowledge it, because I can use it to turn the tides. I can allow myself to listen to My Essence. 

I am listening intuitively to my body and practicing sorting through the external cues telling me what I "should" do (everything from 'take this sick day to get stuff done around the house' to 'call the doctor, because this could be the early stages of some mortal disease, and I'll feel like an idiot if I don't take action right away'), to the small but sure voice that says 'slow down, clear your mind and listen with your heart, not your head' and then 'love yourself in this moment'.

I acknowledge that voice. It is my True Self, my Essence, my inner Warrior Goddess. I acknowledge that I am worthy of self care. I can take time to rest and heal, and I know in my heart that my body knows how to heal. It's talking now, quietly, saying:

'Yes' to meditation
'Yes' to mobility and gentle movement.
'Yes' to a soothing bath and fresh water.

There might even be a nap in my future. I'll keep listening.

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